


Already I knew the list of crimes

by middlemarch



Category: The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel (TV)
Genre: Character Study, Comedians, Drinking, F/M, Secrets, Weddings, relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-06
Updated: 2018-07-06
Packaged: 2019-06-06 08:59:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15191339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/middlemarch/pseuds/middlemarch
Summary: She doesn't know everything but this is what she does know.





	Already I knew the list of crimes

Midge had so many more secrets than anyone knew.

No one knew she loved her daughter more than her son.

No one knew she thought of Lenny when she was in her twin bed. Unless she thought of Susie, laughing and cursing.

No one knew she hated her wedding dress, that she had wanted ranunculus and not roses, that she thought shrimp was over-rated, egg rolls or otherwise.

No one knew she dreamed of hitting Penny Pann in the head with the electric pencil-sharpener.

No one knew she missed Joel because he smelled good, because he liked to listen to her sing off-key in the shower, because he once said he liked her better as a brunette, because he cried the day of Ethan’s bris.

No one knew she hated the taste of plummy red wine, kosher wine. No one knew how hard it was to get tipsy and not to throw the empty bottle in the street to see it shatter. 

No one knew how it felt to hold that mic in her hand, to hear that rolling laughter, like a wave crashing, to know she made it happen. To feel the spotlight on her face like the sunshine and to know it could burn her the same way.

No one knew that no matter how much better her life was becoming, she still woke up from dreams of the past and felt tears in her throat, where she’d swallowed them. 

No one knew she thought secrets were like bread. The stuff of life. Too much of them could ruin you. But she’d never stop taking one more bite.

**Author's Note:**

> The title is from Anna Akhmatova, the famous Russian poet (for Russian lit Midge). The next line is: "That I was destined to commit."


End file.
